One of the key themes throughout all that has been shared about self love is boundaries. Whether you’re great at drawing your lines in the sand or struggle a little bit, Here are 4 ways to set new or reaffirm existing boundaries and give you to more self love.
Before a boundary can be set, you have to get clear on what it is that you need to create protective space around. One big boundary for me, is my time. I’m a big protector of my time. It doesn’t matter if it’s work or personal. My time is a valuable asset to me so I protect it. At 5 pm unless it’s an emergency, I stop working. Any emails can be responded to on the next day.
I also make sure not to over schedule myself socially. I know I need downtime and if I’m on the go all weekend without any time to myself, I get really cranky. While time is important to me this could be something different for you. One way to identify some boundaries to set is looking at what you value. This can be with work, friendships, relationships and even yourself. Once you’re clear on what you need boundaries for, everything else is easy to do.
What’s Your Limit?
We all have a limit. No matter the situation, there is a point when we will break if we continue to ignore something. As you uncover your values, think about where the limit is for you. What is your breaking point? This will be different for everyone and will vary based on the boundary being set. Once you’ve identified your limit, the next step is to identify the consequence. Whether it’s having a conversation or ending a friendship or relationship, identifying the limit and the consequence is where creating a boundary begins.
Actions speak louder that words.
This is true in all areas of life. It’s not what we say that people respond to but what we do. Even if you have shared your boundaries with others, it’s what you do when someone tries to cross a line (because they will) that really matters. If someone crosses a boundary and you don’t take any action, that person will continue to disrespect your boundaries. Let your actions speak louder than what you say. Eventually they’ll get it.
Self Love is Greater Than Feelings.
Setting boundaries are all to benefit you. Yes, there ill be people who won’t like your boundaries and that’s OK, but they don’t have to like them to respect them. Creating that respect is all about what you do. Don’t let anyone’s reaction cause you to blur your boundary lines.